Book Review: A Severe Mercy by Sheldon Vanauken

This was, to say the least, a difficult book to read. Not difficult in terms of reading level, but in terms of subject matter. It deals heavily with issues of grief/bereavement, dealing with the death of a loved one, and absolute reliance on God's grace and mercy to get you through.

I approached this book apprehensively at first, being less than three months removed from the death of my dad. This deals with the death of a man's wife, but it nonetheless made me nervous. I in no way regret reading A Severe Mercy, in fact I am so thankful that I did read it. I strongly recommend this book to you, but understand that this is not a book to read flippantly or too quickly. It is a very taxing read, but so very worth it.

I will strive to review this book in a way that is complete, as I want it to be, but that does not give away too much.

A Severe Mercy begins with a walk down memory lane and the retelling of a truly incredible love story of Sheldon and Jean "Davy" Vanauken, beginning in their "pagan" youth and later conversion to Christianity, and the development of their close personal friendship with C. S. Lewis. All of this makes for most delightful read. As the book progresses Davy becomes very ill and is facing death.

Reading through this section of the book I was very struck by the double-image in my mind, looking back and forward. Looking back at the time my dad was in the hospital for the last time, feeling that ache of the imminence of death for someone so close. Looking forward in knowledge that I will likely be in the same position with my future wife, imagining the pain of the encroaching death of the one who would be my best friend, my beloved. This is where my reading of this book really slowed, going from reading nearly half the book in a day to only reading half a chapter a day. Maybe reading this book isn't so hard for most, but I was truly pulled into this book, I came to really love the people of this story. Another reason it was difficult is because Sheldon and Davy had marriage much like the one I aspire to have. They were best friends, he was a university professor, they often had students over to share Christ with them, all things that I aspire to. All of these factors made reading a bit taxing, feeling like, in small way, I was truly experiencing this with them.

But one must press on, as life always presses on. As expected, Davy dies. Sheldon withdraws for a time to mourn her death. In this time he begins a very long, arduous, but true remarkable mourning process, wishing to know the "whole" Davy, from beginning to end through all stages of life. I was personally inspired by his desire to do this, because often the reaction is to remove everything that reminds you of a lost loved one, but he did the opposite. Through this process he came to see the incredible mercy of God in this tragic event, helping me to better see the mercy and grace of God in my father's death. Helping me to understand that it was best for me and for my dad that he go, than that he remain here. This is an incredibly hard fact to accept, but, as I have come to see, so necessary.

I will conclude here for fear that I may have already given away too much of the book.

This has certainly been a very taxing few weeks in reading this book and writing this review for you, and, in some manner, re-mourning my dad's death. However, it has also been very cathartic to write this review and share this testimony from my life. I hope you enjoy this review. I wish you all the best and again encourage you to read this book for yourself.

-Living under the Mercy,

Wesley Lawrence